Here’s a little secret. Ready? Your life’s purpose is to grow and learn and experience joy and happiness. Does this mean you will always feel happy? Probably not. Especially during times of emotional trauma or tragic events, finding happiness or joy feels almost impossible.

But there is a distinct difference between joy and happiness. Joy comes from a place within when you are connected to Infinite Source or God-consciousness and you know all is well and you feel safe and loved. We feel happiness when something amazing happens to us or there is a happy change in our circumstances.

You can feel JOY whenever you want just because. You don’t have to have a reason. You can feel joy at any time when you place this as your focus. Even after a traumatic event such as divorce.

Happiness is unstable. Take away the circumstances that made you happy, and there go the happy feelings. Joy is steady and solid. It’s there for us to experience at all times. Look around at the beautiful miracles in the world; the flowers and trees when they are first budding in the Spring after a cold, dark winter. A child jumping up and down in a rain puddle squealing with delight. Young children know pure joy. They don’t wait for or strive for the happy times. As adults, we push through the minutia of daily living hoping to find happiness.

We feel we will be happy when we graduate college, get that new job, get married, have a baby. It’s a huge part of why divorce is so devastating. We didn’t sign up for it and there was no striving to become divorced. It’s something that happened whether you made the decision to end your marriage or not. And if you believed that getting married would bring you happiness, the shock of divorce is shattering.

So how do you find the joy within when you are dealing with grief and heartbreak? The first thing to remember is to allow yourself to sink into and feel those painful emotions. The intensity will lesson as you acknowledge your feelings versus pushing them down and ignoring them.

Then you can begin to go within and connect to joy. Can you remember a time in your life when you felt pure joy because you were living in the moment and noticing the beauty all around you?

When I look back on my own life, I remember specific periods of time when I felt what I thought was happiness, but was pure joy. They can feel the same. You will know the difference based on what it is that is creating the feeling. Because when I felt that kind of happiness, it had nothing to do with my circumstances or events that were going on in my life. In fact, it was usually during periods of time when not much was happening outwardly in my life.

It was during those times that I was living in the present moment and leaning back. Which means allowing my life to unfold exactly how it was unfolding. There was no tension, no gripping, no trying to control anything. These are the times I remember feeling the most joyful.

So this is the important piece to remember after divorce. Although, you may be feeling a deluge of painful emotions, you can still connect to the joy within.

Challenge yourself to find the little things that brought you joy in the past and begin to sprinkle those things into your day. You will open yourself up to this profound place of light and joy within when you allow life to be just as it is.

With Love and Light,

Lisa

Positive Quote of the Day: Joy is what is available to us when we allow life to be just as it is. -Lisa Bruchac

P.S. I have a favor to ask. I am really close to wrapping up my long awaited e-guide on how to heal and move forward in a powerful way after divorce. Can you please respond to these three simple questions to help me give you what you NEED in order to move forward in a powerful way after divorce? Go HERE. Thank you!