Everyone has been through a lot this past year. The stress levels on a personal level have reached levels we have not seen before in our lifetime.
As a single mom the beginning of this pandemic was a time of extreme stress, grief, and shock that I was raising a young daughter during this unprecedented time.
Not only was I working full-time out of the home, but I also now had to figure out childcare, and keeping my daughter going with school as I learned her school was closing for 5 weeks. That seemed doable once I caught my breath. But school never re-opened until the Fall. And it was vastly different when she did return to school with a shorter school day which did not fit in with my work schedule.
All moms have the weight of the responsibility to raise amazing human beings.
Whether or not, you have support from a co-parent, the responsibility seems to fall on moms. The weight of the responsibility was there before the Pandemic. But the new challenges we, as single moms, are facing, seem almost unbearable.
Many single moms are essential workers and the fear of having to go to work and risk bringing home the virus to their children, can make even the toughest of us crack. Being furloughed due to being exposed is also a real concern and can throw off the delicate balance of a single mom’s budget.
If you are a newly single mom going through the divorce proceedings, all while juggling work, childcare, schoolwork, and bills on your own, it can feel like you are spiraling down into a pit of despair.
Being a single mom for the past 5 years has been challenging, but the real challenge occurred this year as I vacillated between extreme fear and despair to moments of feeling like we will pull through.
These 5 things I am about to share are what have helped me navigate such a high stress time in my life (and I continue to focus on these 5 things).
1. STAY IN THE PRESENT MOMENT
This is what I needed to do to keep my sanity. Just knowing I needed to handle only what was right in front of me, helped my let go of my fear of the future. This pandemic reinforced the fact that we only have today. Yes, we need to plan for our future, but really, we only have this one day. I began making choices that I could do for one day only. This helped lessen my overwhelm.
I only needed to help my daughter with her assignment for that day. I could let go of my fear that she was falling behind and worrying about how she would ever catch up. I only needed to appreciate for that day that I had childcare. And that I could relax at work knowing my daughter was being well-cared for.
I began eating healthier in the middle of this Pandemic to keep myself healthy and focusing on something I could control.
Day by day and moment by moment.
I started focusing on simple joys such as enjoying my morning cup of tea or coffee.
2. TRUST IN UNIVERSAL SUPPORT
Any setback such as a job loss, loss of a loved one, a relationship or marriage ending can throw us out of alignment with the Divine.
Reclaim the belief that life works for you.
When you have been through a devastating life event such as divorce and you are thrust into a life you never dreamed about, your belief in life and the Universe can be ruined.
Focusing on reclaiming your trust that all is well will help you immensely. What if what you have been through was spiritually orchestrated for your highest and greatest good?
Trust that you have a team of spiritual support all around you who are cheering you on in the direction you are meant to go.
3. RADICAL SELF-CARE
Constant stress can wreak havoc on our health. Single moms in their 30s, 40s, and 50s, are at high risk for throwing off the delicate balance of hormones which can strip you of your energy making it harder to manage the stress and the daily activities that must be done. It can be a vicious cycle.
Self-care is not a luxury, but a necessity to manage times of high stress. You either may have a belief that it is selfish to take care of yourself or you literally do not have the time or energy. You are last on the list. But you cannot continue to do all that you do unless you fill your own cup.
Taking 5-minute breaks, what I call heart breath breaks, can calm your nervous system immediately (based on research from the HeartMath Institute.) When you are in a more relaxed and calm state, you open yourself to Divine assistance. Ideas or answers to your most pressing issues have a chance to come through so you can put them into action to help ease your life.
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4. APPRECIATE WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE
I know this can be a tough one especially if your lifestyle has changed and you were feeling lost prior to the Pandemic. Now, your focus may be about surviving.
When you are in the mode of surviving only, it is exceedingly difficult to feel appreciation for what you do have.
Keeping a simple gratitude list each day has been proven through research studies to expand our energy and have more show up in our life and ease our stress. Start small and watch as your energy expands. In no time, you will be noticing all the things in your life that are there to support you.
5. SURRENDER
You are not in control.
This 9-letter word causes me to have heart palpitations at times.
I know I need to surrender, but I tend to want to do it my way. When I do lean back and surrender to what is and accept whatever is happening, my life flows better than when I am trying to take the wheel.
Allow yourself to ask deeper questions.
Allow yourself time to process your emotions which will help them dissipate much more quickly than if you continue to use your energy to stuff them down or try to make them go away.
True surrender is the sacred space needed to show up in a new way and allow your new life to materialize. Every one of us has a blueprint for our life. Align yourself with this Soul blueprint and you will be led down the path of your destiny with ease and grace.
Having radical trust that things are exactly as they need to be will allow you to lean back, surrender to what is, and make choices every day that are for your highest and greatest good.
Wishing you so much love,
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