Healing takes time, but time does not do the healing for you. There are steps that need to be taken in order to heal from within after heartbreak. Divorce can catapult you into an arena you never thought you’d be in and the devastation is profound.

You may feel like you will never feel an ounce of happiness or joy again.

I know when my separation initially occurred, I looked around at others who were enjoying simple activities such as reading a book for pleasure and wondered if I’d ever have the inclination to pick one up again. I couldn’t see one inch in front of me. Everything was black and the joy felt like it got sucked out of my life. I was also embarrassed by my situation and couldn’t believe my husband had an affair and then left.

It took a lot of self-inquiry for me to understand what was really happening and the purpose of it all. Once I began to understand that what happened was to awaken me to living a more conscious and authentic life, my healing journey began.

Today, I know I have healed so much of what was in my way to moving forward in my life with a new sense of purpose and dare I say, joy.

There are ways to tell if you are on your healing journey. And just remember that healing is NOT a linear pathway. You will spiral in and out of emotions such as grief, anger, depression, etc. But each time, the intensity will lessen.

Here are 5 ways to know you are healing and moving forward after your heartbreak or divorce:

  • You have accepted your situation and where you are in life right now.

When you have truly let go of the life you thought you had and stepped into a place of total acceptance and surrender of where you are now, you know you have healed a large part of your grief. You may feel an occasional twinge of sadness or anxiety about the changes that have occurred, but you can quickly release them and move forward without collapsing into the grief.

  • You can talk about your divorce without feeling sad or embarrassed.

Being able to talk about your divorce or the events in the past in a way that feels like you are talking about someone else that this happened to, is one way to realize you have moved on. Or when you can talk about it without a single tear, you will know you have left the past where it should be; behind you.

  • You are conscious of the patterns that keep showing up in your life

It’s not enough to recognize the patterns that keep repeating in your life, although it’s a necessary step to healing. But finding ways to heal these patterns so they don’t continue to direct your life unconsciously is what will transform your outer world. There are many ways to heal limiting beliefs and toxic patterns, so find what works for you and make a commitment to yourself that you will do whatever it takes to heal from within.

Doing this ensures you will be facing a future of endless possibilities that are yours to create. You’ll be able to create from a place of more empowering beliefs and thoughts.

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  • You are making decisions that are for your highest good and not worrying about what others may think

Being able to make good choices takes a good amount of trust in ourselves and in the Universe. After a divorce, it may feel like you are moving through quicksand and unable to find your momentum forward. Every decision can feel like a herculean task.

I know after my divorce and I was thrown into the new world of single parenting, I felt frozen. I was so afraid to make a decision because I was afraid of making “another” wrong choice. I felt like my past decisions got me to this place and it certainly wasn’t a place I wanted to be in.

Eventually, I built my trust in myself back up when I began to believe that there are no “mistakes.” And I began to listen to and trust my intuition again which really helped me move forward and make decisions with confidence.

Once you are able to build up your trust in yourself again and begin making decisions from a place of inner power and following your inner voice, you know you have moved on in your healing journey.

  • You are moving out of your comfort zone and trying new things

This is a biggie. Although, we are thrown out of our comfort zone after the traumatic experience of divorce, we may find ourselves trying to find safe ground to feel comfortable again. But true living and growth occurs when we step out of our comfort zone and stretch ourselves to reach for our highest potential. Divorce is an opportunity to catapult you forward as a person and become who you were meant to be.

You will know you are healing, when you are able to let go of trying to find safe ground and keep moving forward and challenging yourself to grow in ways that weren’t possible in the confines of your marriage.

If you’ve read this and feel that you are ready to deal with your pain and grief, I would love to hear from you. Please comment below.

Make today be the day you make a choice that allows you to step into who you want to be. Whatever you desire for your life is possible as you heal grief and trauma from within. This is truly the first step that cannot be overlooked. Trying to stuff the pain down so you don’t have to feel it or deal with it only fuels the flames of pain.

If you’ve read this and smiled knowing you have healed so much of your grief, I would also love to hear from you and what you did to move forward.

Wishing you so much love and light,

Lisa

Positive Quote of the Day: “Often what feels like the end of the world is really a challenging pathway to a far better place.” -Karen Salmansohn

Check out my Heartbreak Recovery Kit: Your 30-Day Prescription to Happiness After Divorce. This Eguide is packed with a blueprint and tools and principles so you can step onto your healing path and begin building your foundation in which to launch your new life.